Do Women Find A Crying Man Attractive
Or A Turn Off?
By Yangki Christine Akiteng, Love Doctor
Does crying make
you more or less of a man? This is one of those age-old
questions which get taken for granted and has never been
fully answered, until now...
Crying has always been believed to be a sign of femininity
and a trait that should be left to women. In cultures where
“Macho” or “Alpha Male” are considered a symbol of
masculinity and where men are supposed to be aggressive,
tough, analytical, emotionally detached, ambitious, and
focused on power and domination and women are supposed to be
more modest, understanding, sensitive, tender, nurturing,
intuitive, emotional, passive, indecisive, impulsive,
sentimental, and concerned with beauty; crying especially in
front of a woman is considered unmanly, a sign of weakness
or timidity
Because we’ve been conditioned to think that one is either
masculine or feminine and can not be both we see a man who
expresses his feminine side as taking away from his
masculine side. This thinking is faulty from get-go and has
nothing to do with what is natural or with reality. Many
ancient and many other philosophies recognize that every
person is born with qualities of the opposite sex within her
or him, not simply in the biological sense, but also in the
psychological and psychosexual sense of attitudes, feelings,
dreams and desires.
Men because of their biological make up express more of the
masculine energy (engaging and challenging their external
world including their genitals which are more externally
pronounced) and women because of their biological make up
express more of their feminine energies (creating a safe
inner space that represents sensitivity and nurturing, yeah,
yeah including the genitals). If a man or woman is well
adjusted and harmoniously balanced, the feminine traits of
the man and the masculine traits of the woman are both
expressed. To say one is an "ideal/real man" or "ideal/real"
woman would be to say one is an ideal human being with a
good balance of both sexual energies.
The balance of these energies basically means men need women
in their lives to see the reflection of their own feminine
energies and women need men in their lives to see the
reflection of their own masculine energies.
When a man has his masculine energy well developed he can
afford to express his feminine energy without fear, timidity
or feeling a threat to his masculinity which is already
strong and developed. He can afford to break down into tears
and sob uncontrollably in front of millions of men and women
and still be the sexiest man in the crowd. But when a man’s
masculinity is not well developed and strong, he’ll tend to
suppress his feminine side (i.e. crying, being sensitive,
nurturing etc) because he is already insecure about his
masculinity. He'll tend to express a more "macho" or Alpha
Male" image to try to cover up his insecurity about his
masculinity.
If he is not showcasing his fake masculinity, he'll be
hiding from it by being door-mat "nice". And when
he cries
or sobs he comes across as “feminine” because his masculine
energy is overshadowed by his feminine energy and his
sobbing and whimpering can be a major irritant and turn off
to women who naturally desire a man to mirror their own
(developed) masculine energy.
On the other side, a woman who is insecure about her femininity will
be confused and uncomfortable when she sees a man crying
(“hey, I am the woman and I am the one supposed to cry”)
because she is operating out of insecurity and lack of
understanding of her own dual energies.
The bottom line is, if you are man enough to cry, real women
who are secure about themselves will find you very, very
sexy when you express your own feminine energy. A man who is
more sensitive, tender, compassionate, sympathetic and
basically communicates that he s “only human” is not a weak
man but an "ideal/REAL man."
To all REAL men out there let the tears flow free. It is not
just human, it's sexy!
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