Many people openly and consciously yearn for a soul mate and even believe that there is that “right” person is out there for them but few make the dream a reality. The search for love and intimacy with one’s soul mate is not for everyone and certainly not for the faint-hearted. This is a path for those who aren’t just looking for wholeness, or to be part of a couple, it is a path for people who are interested in a love that opens them, and takes them into the depths of their own souls, own being and beyond.
Before heading off in quest for your soul mate, it would be wise to have a conscious plan of where exactly you are going and what you are looking for; otherwise you risk getting lost in the jungles of the unknown and arriving to the wrong destination.
The person who has thought something through is usually the one that gets the result they are looking for. A plan with a list of concrete actionable steps is one of the keys to reaching your relationship goal. It gives you the guidelines and determination to make the first steps, gradually moving closer to your soul mate dream.
If you really want to attract your soul mate then you must put the energy you generate swinging between hope and desperation into focused purposeful actions steps that are fun, magical, full of spontaneity and imagination and that move you closer to your soul mate. To help you create a plan that is balanced, realistic, well thought-out and most importantly one that works I have listed below principles and strategies already used successfully by many others to manifest their soul mate reality sooner. Here goes:
Decide what you want (emotionally, intellectually, physically, sexually, spiritually etc.). Sit down and work out what life is all about to you and what you believe in. What is your vision for a fulfilling relationship? What level of commitment are you looking for? Are your beliefs and values empowering or limiting you?. Look at previous relationships, what was good and bad about them, what happened and what have you learned about yourself, about what you want and what you can not tolerate? What thoughts, words, beliefs, actions, things need to be changed (or removed) for you to be in alignment with what you want? By making the decision to align your attention to your intention you are telling your unconscious mind that you are serious about finding your soul mate.
Break it down into small, clear, actionable steps. Understanding how we manifest our soul mate reality is already mind boggling as it is without us over-complicating things further with fantasies, myths, empty hopes or hype. These things deny us the power to truly transform to the point where we attract a soul mate or create a truly fulfilling relationship. A well thought-out plan that works must be simple and realistic. Breaking down a complicated concept such as this into small actionable steps makes it manageable. When you have manageable steps, you have a process you can more easily track. When you have a process you can more easily track, you have much more control and accountability. When you have more control and accountability you’ll attract love more easily and sooner.
Love magnetize yourself. It’s fullness and not emptiness that makes a relationship work. You know you are operating from a fullness mode when you are so full of love that you just can’t wait to offer some of your abundance to others. When you are truly in touch with your goodness, you’ll find that it overflows and that same goodness will return to touch you sooner than later. Do your inner work and get rid of the mental and emotional obstacles that obstruct you from unconditional love because when self-love develops without the capacities of spirit you become more focused on what you can get rather than what you can give and give in order to get. A relationship is not a possession, it is a process. You don’t acquire one, you get into one. The more you fill up your “emptiness”, the more you will grow and the easier it will be for you to attract someone special.
Create an emotional snapshot. Basically this is an internalized emotional picture of how great you’ll feel when you’re with the right person, not what your love interest looks like, or what he or she does, but how you feel when you’re around them. Be outrageous and let your imagination fly. This does not mean thinking unrealistic, pie-in-the-sky stuff, like being able to suddenly perform superhuman feats. It means allowing yourself to stretch and believe in the beauty of your dreams. This will help you get in touch with and engage your emotional self. It will get you in a place within yourself where you really believe it can happen. If you don’t, it won’t.
Get courtship smart. Many people wait until they are in a wonderful relationship to start learning what makes a relationship great unaware that great relationships begin with your ability to court differently and feel confident and comfortable about yourself and about your sexuality. Take the time to learn whatever there is that will increase your sexual confidence. Learn the things that make you a great partner, lover, companion, friend and spouse. This is one way of attracting another great person.
Become your own dating service. You could meet your soul mate anywhere—it could be a current love interest, a person with whom you are already in a relationship, or the man or woman just down the block. Yes, you may even find yours in a chat room or he/she could walk right into your own living room. Does that mean that you should not get out and date? I don’t think so. Get out and meet people. The great thing about meeting as many people as you can is that the more you know about others the more you learn about yourself, and the more you know about yourself the more able you are to recognize your soul mate when you meet him or her. Your attitude should be “I commit myself to learning everything I can from this person and this experience.” Simply saying “Hi” with a smile when someone looks at you is powerful enough.
Trust, let go and never give up. We all go through a lot of trials and tribulations before we find someone special to love. There’s nothing wrong with temporary drawbacks. How we plan our dating and courtship is up to each of us as individuals, men and women, based on our values, morals, and who we are. Some people like to keep a learning journal. If you are one of those people, use a notebook, or a computer file. Jot down your actionable steps and visit your plan once a week. Other people find this process much more effective when they have a friend, coach or mentor to act as a “sounding board” and keep them on track.
Pick someone who can be objective and give you honest feedback on your performance. Tell them what you hope to achieve. Talk with them at regular intervals review what you plan to do next and to get feedback on how you’re progressing. Always remember to make a note of how you are doing. (Give yourself a “reward” when you’ve achieved some of the things you set out to do!).
The point is to devise a strategy to get unstuck when you get discouraged and down on yourself. If your first plan fails, try another plan. If that plan fails, try another and so on and so on. Keep trying until you find a plan that works. Often times we fail because we lack persistence in creating new plans in the place of those that fail. You only fail when you give up.
Attracting your soul mate starts with believing that the universe WANTS you to experience such JOY... ends with TAKING ACTION to change your life. Don’t wait until you meet your soul mate to start loving. Make loving a part of your life and others will fall in love with you!